I have a friend… =>i am sure you also have a lot of them…

she is in love( no not with me.. i am a pure third party here.. not involved in the mess)…=>i am sure you friends also love someone or the other…

the guy she loves does not reciprocate… =>i am sure you know what that feels like…

the guy she loves is a very good friend… takes care of her.. likes to talk to her… spend time with her.. but when she confessed her love to him he told her that he could not love her… ( could not… what does that mean)… and that he was feeling guilty for not being able to reciprocate and that he just could not think of a relationship for sometime..( very valid points…) he wants to think about his career at this time ( he should do that… its important).. and that he could not get married for the next 4 years ( ok.. so that timeline is set too!!) => i am sure this sounds like something you have heard or seen or witnessed or felt sometime or the other…

now coming to the issue we have been discussing for the past couple of days… she wants to get out of the feeling of love for him.. but is not able to… i asked her what is she doing to get away from the feeling.. here is what she told me..
prashant, i think about not messaging him.. but i end up SMSing…
prashant, i think about not talking to him.. but i end up TALKing…
prashant, i think about not thinking about what he did.. why he did…but i end up THINKing…

my response… my dear, every sentence that you said ends with a verb related to him only… so invariably you are doing what you are running away from… and to really avoid this… start thinking about things which end up differently… like…
i think about reading books…
i think about watching TV…
i think about walking…
i think about learning guitar…

i feel that none of these things are related to anyone outside her ownself.. its about her… and would stay about her…

why do ppl get so irrational when they think they love someone… ( include me here, the prashant about 1.5 years back… madly hooked to a girl, used to be like this…) I will talk about this sometime later… things which we do in love… and how concern becomes pestering… how questions become lack of privacy and independence…

getting back to what i started the post with….do you think i gave her the right opinion…. why do u think someone would not like the person who likes him or her.. and if (s)he does not.. then what can the other person do… after being rejected !!!